Obama’s Announcement on Afghanistan

Here’s what I hope President Obama says tonight in his address on Afghanistan:

“Good evening.  During these last few weeks while I have been ‘dithering’ on Afghanistan I had a brain fart.  General McChrystal tells me he wants 40,000 more troops to accomplish the mission, though we can’t say for certain how long they’ll have to be there.  Peter Orszag over at OMB tells me that it’ll cost us a cool million bucks per trooper per year.  That ain’t their pay.  Hell, most of their families qualify for food stamps.  It ain’t for bullets and MRE’s either.  Most of it goes to those overpaid war profiteers who provide sub-par support services to our brave troops.

Then it hit me.  The Taliban gets a bunch of it’s funding from the opium trade in Afghanistan.  It’s about a $3 billion/year trade.  So what if we told the Afghans that we’ll buy all their poppy crop for, say,  $4 billion/year.  This would dry up Taliban funding.  Game over.

Plus we’d be $36 billion/year to the good.  Plus we’d cut the supply of heroin and the crime that’s associated with the drug trade.  We could burn the crop, or sell it to manufacturers that make medicinal opiates and recoup some of our costs.

The only losers in this plan, outside of the Taliban, are those shareholders of the war profiteering companies who like a fat dividend check at the taxpayer’s expense,  like say, a certain fat former Vice President…

Yes my fellow Americans, this is a win-win situation for us and our friends in Afghanistan.

Thank you, and may God bless the United States of America.”



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41 responses to “Obama’s Announcement on Afghanistan

  1. Morning peeps.
    Sure d, drive up the cost of smack on the world wide market, as if addicts don’t have it hard enough as it is!

  2. dog's eye view

    An ingenious idea. And it would be great if the poppies could be used for medicines/pain relief, which are greatly needed.

    A cool million per additional soldier for troop funding? That’s sobering.

    I think we should blog Obama’s address tonight on this website.

  3. hey dog, I’ll be around during the address.

  4. dnd

    Today is World AIDS Day.

    The one thing that Bush 43 got right was to raise awareness of AIDS, particularly in Africa.

  5. dog's eye view

    Brian: good to know re tonight. Think I’m around too and have a more reliable internet connection.

  6. nannymm

    I’ll believe it when I see it, Brian.

  7. Everyone ready for our West Point rendezvous?

  8. nannymm

    I’m heading up to my bedroom now to snuggle up in bed and watch it. It was a tough day at rehab and I’m hurting.

  9. Why are you now just going up to bed nanny?

  10. dog's eye view

    Good evening all. Check back in a few.

  11. Well his tone is certainly more stern than I expected.

  12. dog's eye view

    The nation I am most interested in rebuilding is our own.

  13. dog's eye view

    The moral source of America’s authority.

    I think this is a terrific speech.

  14. I seriously don’t have a clue as to what the right thing to do is, it shifts with my mood.

  15. dog's eye view

    I think there’s just a calibrated set of less horrible options.

    Will want to read the speech. Missed a lot of the beginning. (Miss CSpan — don’t have it here, and you know they’ll run the speech at least 2-3 times overnight.)

  16. Yeah, someone also called during it and I took the call, was a client.

  17. dnd

    Well, once again, the president didn’t take my advice. What’s wrong with that guy?

  18. Morning peeps,
    D I suspect when you said “brain fart” he naturally assumed you were talking about Bush.

  19. nannymm

    Personally, I’m not pleased. I don’t like the idea of sending more troops. In fact, I think it’s a fools” (Bush and Cheney’s) mission and should be brought to an immediate end. I watched the president’s speech but fail to see why he is doing this. Seems to me there is a bit of Lyndon Johnson there; Obama doesn’t want to be the one to “lose” this unwinable war. What a fricken miserable mess those bastards Cheney and Bush got this country in!

  20. nannymm

    Brian, I went to bed at 8 last night because I was in so much pain that I just needed to lay down. My shoulder and arm felt like they were being ripped off my body. So, I propped it up on pillows and packed it with ice followed by heat. Got some temporary relief.

  21. Nanny I too am I very troubled, I’m going on the premise that he truly thinks this is the right thing to do or he wouldn’t be doing it. Politically this is a wash he gains nothing by us staying or pulling us out completely. Lets all hope he’s made the right decision!

  22. Nanny are you sure they aren’t pushing you too quickly at rehab?

  23. nannymm

    I’m sure he thinks it’s the right decision but His logic escapes me. And while I hope and pray that he is doing the right thing, I don’t think so. I fear that this is going to be a long term disaster. As for the 18 month strategy, I’ll believe that when hell freezes over.

  24. nannymm

    I had a consult with a different therapist yesterday about that very question. The answer is no; it’s just that my injury was so severe and so widespread that it is going to be a very long and painful process. If they don’t move those joints, they’re going to freeze and the muscles will atrophy even more than they already have. Lucky me…. 😦

  25. nannymm

    Am I the only one who thinks the press needs to leave Tiger Woods alone? I don’t give a damn about his personal life and don’t see why anyone else should either.

  26. dnd

    It’s the role of physical therapists to torture you. I had an ACL repair years ago and had to go to physical therapy. It was hell. But my doctor told me the same thing your different therapist said.

  27. dnd

    ps. nannymm,
    I too think the press should leave Tiger Woods alone. This is National Enquirer journalism.

  28. nanny the Tiger Woods story is another of those stories I so don’t give a damn about.

  29. dnd

    I’m really puzzled by Obama’s decision. If one looks at the mujahideen in Afghanistan, they defeated the Soviets and the Afghan government troops, and then the fought each other. This tells me three things:

    1. We don’t need to teach them how to fight. They are very accomplished fighters.
    2. A national army there ain’t gonna be worth much.
    3. This is a culture that will side with the highest bidder. So why don’t we just bribe the local warlords?

    That said, I’m assuming the president has more information and analysis than amateur armchair foreign policy analysts like me (and all the pundits on cable). So for now I give him the benefit of the doubt. I can deal if after all the thoughtful deliberation it turns out it was a mistake. But if we find out later that this was politically driven or ideologically driven, I’m gonna be really pissed.

  30. Well if it’s politically driven I fail to see what he’s gaining d.

  31. OMG Merdith Baxter is gay, the world is going to hell in a hand cart!

  32. Matthews: Obama Made Speech At ‘Enemy Camp,’ Cheney Is A ‘Troll’ (VIDEO)


  33. dnd

    Mike Littwin on the Obama speech:

    If there’s one thing that was clear in Barack Obama’s speech, it’s that he wasn’t auditioning to be the next war president.


  34. nannymm

    At the rate he’s going, dnd, he may not be the next president in 2012.

  35. nannymm

    I’m so disappointed!

    New York State Senate Votes Down Gay Marriage Bill

  36. Evening peeps, yes nanny, extremely disappointing!

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